To the Moms in the First Two Years (or Just Coming Out of Them): You’re Still in There
If you’re in the first two years of motherhood—or just starting to come out of them—I want to tell you something important: you’re not alone. I’ve been there. Twice. And both times were challenging in completely different ways. But as overwhelming as those early years can feel, I want you to know this: the version of you that feels lost right now? She’s still in there. And one day, you’ll find her again.
Two Babies, Two Journeys
When my son turned one, I had just started thinking about what my next chapter might look like. I wanted to pursue my goals and decided to begin my undergraduate degree—a step toward creating something for myself after devoting his first year to being fully present as his mom.
What I didn’t expect was to find out, just a few weeks after his first birthday, that I was pregnant with my daughter. Life shifted instantly, and suddenly, I was preparing to do it all over again while figuring out how to balance school, a toddler, and another baby on the way. It felt like my plans and dreams were slipping further away, but I knew deep down that this season of motherhood mattered too much to rush through it.
When my daughter was born, I chose to wait until she turned two before starting grad school. I wanted to give her the same presence I had given my son while still holding onto my desire to pursue my dreams. Now, she’s two and a half, and I’ve just stepped into this new phase of life, feeling the fog of those early years start to lift.
But getting here wasn’t easy.
The Weight of the Early Years
The first two years after my daughter’s birth were as full of love as they were of chaos. With a toddler and a newborn, life was a blur of diaper changes, milestones, and endless juggling. I was sober this time, which brought clarity and a sense of groundedness I hadn’t experienced in my first round of motherhood. But even with that, I often felt like I was pouring everything I had into my family and leaving little—if anything—for myself.
I loved my kids fiercely, but I also missed the woman I was before. I missed having the energy and time to dream, to work toward something that was just for me. Some days, I wondered if I’d ever feel like myself again—or if I’d just keep drifting further away from the person I once was.
To the Mom Who Feels Lost
If this is where you are right now, I want you to know it’s okay. It’s okay to feel overwhelmed. It’s okay to love your children with your whole heart and still miss parts of the life you had before. It’s okay to feel like you’re stuck in survival mode, wondering if things will ever get easier.
Motherhood is beautiful, but it’s also one of the hardest things you’ll ever do. It takes everything you have—and sometimes more. But even in those moments when you feel completely lost, you’re still in there. The version of you that had dreams, passions, and energy for herself hasn’t disappeared. She’s just waiting—for the fog to lift, for the chaos to settle, for the space to reemerge.
The Fog Does Lift
Now, as my daughter nears three and my son is no longer a baby, I can feel the shift happening. The fog of those early years is lifting, and I’m starting to see myself again.
It didn’t happen all at once. It’s been a slow process of rediscovery, one small step at a time. Starting grad school was a big step, but the real changes have come in the little moments: carving out time for myself after bedtime, recognizing my own needs alongside theirs, and giving myself permission to dream again.
What I Want You to Know
If there’s one thing these past six years have taught me, it’s that motherhood is as much about rediscovering yourself as it is about raising your children. Here are a few truths that have carried me through!
- You’re Doing Better Than You Think
The hard days don’t define you. The fact that you show up, day after day, is enough. - It’s Okay to Struggle
Struggling doesn’t make you a bad mom—it makes you human. Give yourself grace on the hard days. - Your Dreams Can Wait—But You Don’t Have to Forget Them
Taking a pause doesn’t mean giving up. Your goals will still be there when you’re ready to chase them again. - You’re Still You
The version of you that feels buried under the weight of motherhood isn’t gone. She’s just growing, evolving, and waiting to bloom again.
You’ll Find Yourself Again
If you’re in the thick of the first two years—or just starting to step out of them—I want to remind you of this: motherhood is a season. It’s a beautiful, messy, transformative season, but it doesn’t last forever. The sleepless nights, the constant demands, the feelings of overwhelm—they will fade.
And when they do, you’ll find yourself again. Not the same version of you that existed before kids, but a stronger, wiser, more compassionate version. You’ll look back on these years with awe at how much you carried, how much you gave, and how much you grew.
So, to the mom in the first two years, or just stepping out of them: hold on. You’re doing an incredible job, even when it doesn’t feel like it. And one day soon, you’ll see yourself again—and you’ll be amazed at the woman you’ve become.
You’re Not Alone—Let’s Grow Together
If this resonates with you—if you’re in the thick of those early years or just starting to rediscover yourself—know that you don’t have to do it alone. Share your story, connect with other moms, and lean on the community around you.
I’d love to hear from you: What’s been your biggest challenge in the first two years of motherhood? What has helped you feel like yourself again? Share your thoughts in the comments or reach out—I’d love to connect and support each other on this journey.
And if you’re ready to start taking small steps toward rediscovering yourself, consider this your first one: set aside 10 minutes today, just for you. Whether it’s journaling, sipping your favorite drink in silence, or dreaming about your future, let it be a moment to remind yourself that you matter, too.
Let’s navigate this season together—you’re never alone in this journey. 💕
– Her Mosaic